3 Tips for Taking Drama Out of Your Relationship With Your Teen
Whether you have boys or girls in your family, the teenage years can be full of drama. Sometimes I think we don’t give our kids enough credit. Their hormones are going nuts, they are struggling to work out questions about their identity, and they’ve got schoolwork and extracurriculars to manage too.
One of the keys to dealing with your teen’s drama is keep your own drama in check. Speaking as a yellow mom (yellows are prone to high emotions and can use anger to control situations) that is often easier said than done! Here are three tips for keeping the drama level low when you’re in a confrontation (ahem… a conversation) with your teen:
Stay engaged - even if you don’t love what your teen is saying. As long as they are being respectful, listen without letting your emotions lead the way.
If emotions get too high, tell your child you want to hit pause on the subject. Agree on a time to meet back and continue the discussion. Sometimes changing up your environment does a world of good. Maybe take a drive, go on a walk, or grab a cup of coffee together. A change of scenery can create a better environment for communicating.
Last, but never least - pray and ask the Holy Spirit to help you. It’s not easy, but you will find that your emotions stay steadier and you gain perspective when you practice going to God in prayer - even in the middle of a talk with your teenager!
I love what Paul teaches us in his letter to the church at Galatia, “But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, forbearance, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness and self-control. Against such things there is no law. Those who belong to Christ Jesus have crucified the flesh with its passions and desires. Since we live by the Spirit, let us keep in step with the Spirit.” (Galatians 5:22-26)
Self-control comes from God and we can experience it in our lives even in impossible circumstances because of the Holy Spirit.
Don’t forget what a powerful helper you have in the Spirit, moms!